DESCRIPTION: When I first told The Belated Birthday Girl that I was going to do this, she looked at me like I had the word 'twat' tattooed on my forehead.Yunus Jonah: Escolha injusta nas pessoas para representar cada sotaque Unfair choice of people to represent each accent
Raiderman: This was funny! Remember to be a gentleman!
Alecs__ YT: We got married on Sunday, 20 Dec 2015, and now I am emigrating to Russia to be with my loving Russian wife on 27th May 201
Milly Oddie: Why Western Europe only? I mean, you're Russian (more or less), you could've told lots of things about Eastern Europe as well
Vander Kooy: These are really funny, the Russian men and women videos. Is there one on Americans?
Bryan DaOne: Also northest italians women are like this.
James Drake: Soon as he said she is white ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE THE MOM WASNT HAVING THAT
Drew Downs: And we consume more Toast then Blackbread. Also I never saw someone,planning their Entired Date. All in all this Video Offended me.
KARAB1NAS: Name of the music intro?
Arpad Simko: I really like the Korean and the Spanish guys accents.
AirFire18: Yes vegan ladyboy.
Ajme Majko: Also, dating a British man please :)
Charlie M.P.: London Vitamin Me has the cutest voice, she would be great for like an AI or automated message.
Erieta M: I just saw the how you know you date a german girl video (I am german). We would work great with japanese guys!
Carlos Franco: One more thing ,the english are most of the times sick soo get used to some sniffin gurrrlll
Alejandro Jr: Spanish is FROM SPAIN thanks
Shawna West: All silly sluts. Fuck them.
BubelaJC: Source: I'm Brazilian.
This section is concerned with a fan response to the Asia Extreme festival, written by a fan with the alias 'Spank the Monkey'. The article, a lengthy review of the Asia Extreme roadshow in its entirety, was taken from the website The Unpleasant Lair of Spank The Monkey, which was 'an arts and entertainment review site. 14 Jul The Unpleasant Lair Of Spank The Monkey first appeared on the internet 19 years ago today, on July 14th, , setting out its stall with a post about Warren Ellis' Transmetropolitan because it gave me an excuse to swear a. 19 Oct The Unpleasant Moblog Of Spank The Monkey. by SpankTM. user profile | dashboard | SpankTM maps. Another part of the Spank The Monkey media empire: offending your brain at The Unpleasant Lair Of Spank The Monkey, offending your ears at Spank's Audio Lair, and offending your eyes right here.
Reposted here more for the sake of completeness rather than anything else, given that nine of the ten sites reviewed here no longer exist. Amusingly, it's the dead pool one that's still going. No names, no smashed kneecaps: This struck me as a slightly confusing comment to make.
After all, they're all links pages to some degree or other. But of course, there was an ulterior motive behind this person's complaint: Specifically, my web site, bitch".
So here, without any apology or shame, are ten sites whose sole connection is that I know their owners personally. Other than that, they're all over the place, ranging from personal photo albums to fully fledged business ventures. Pay them a visit and tell them I sent you. You'll find that within 24 hours of me publishing on line for the first time, Dave had sent me my first ever bit of fan mail.
From Singapore, no less, the globe-trotting bugger: So it seems only fitting that his own site is the first one we discuss here. Dave's done quite a bit of travelling over the last few years, in the company the lovely Shona, and this site is basically a great big online photo album documenting their exploits.
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey from a whole variety of annoyingly gorgeous Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey - Goa, Thailand, Singapore, Glasgow - culminate in the epic collection of shots from their wedding in Zimbabwe. Even if peering at other people's holiday snaps sounds like your idea of hell, there's a lot of very nice pictures to look at here.
The Ross Leopard [dead link, new management are based here ] But there's more! Not only does Dave go shooting off around the world to make us all jealous, he also co-owns one of the most impossibly funky venues in London.
The Ross Leopard is a fishing trawler which he acquired with some mates a few years ago. They moored it on the Thames next to Chelsea Bridge and opened it up as a floating bar and music venue: I namechecked it briefly back in when Dave held a party on it prior to his world tour. Its fortunes have gone up and down over the years, and it's currently looking for a new mooring site. Contact details are available on the site, along with some pictures of the trawler itself.
Bar Foo [dead link] Tsk. What with their twin-step garage music and their temazepam jelly babies, it's almost impossible to
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey track of what they're "into" these days. Voodoo regularly hangs out in a role-playing chatroom-style doofer-thing known as The Keep [dead link]and the Bar is basically a place which some of the regular chatters can repair to in order to get out of their virtual boxes.
Read their increasingly deranged entries in the guestbook, follow the links to their personal sites, and have a giggle at Mr Fysh's own amusing
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey in the Randomness section. But don't tell him that you were referred to his page by someone who used to go to school with his mum, or else he'll be mortified. And once they get their Surftime low-cost offering off the ground, I'll be positively moist with affection for it.
But sometimes the prospect of having to fill that 20Mb of webspace they give you can be a little daunting. Personally, it's not a problem for me, as all the image files I created in the first 18 months of this site are so ridiculously oversized
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey I'm working on that.
For others, it can mean that a site which was originally focussed on one single topic ends up diversifying wildly just to make up the megabytes.
Andy's page is a case in point: But the site's brief subsequently broadened to include an online photo album which is where Andy lets Louise take over and, more excitingly for a general audience such yourselves, the home page of our company deadpool. At the start of the year, 15 of us placed bets on which celebrities they expected to die duringand Andy updates this page regularly to document recent snuffees and Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey our successes.
Have a look at the list of predictions and see if you can work out which ones are sure-fire bets, long shots or simply wishful thinking.
Vignette [dead link] Another Demon site, this one courtesy of occasional letters page correspondent Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey Tony, and it's a similar story to Stamp.
The main thrust of the site is Uncle Tony's World Tour Of Beer, in which he documents and rates all of the myriad varieties of ale he's quaffed over the years in various countries. But aside from that, we also have a couple of pages dedicated to some bands that Tony's been tangentially involved with, notably Intelligent Seaweed "Their name derives from an episode of Dr.
Who - you know, the one featuring the intelligent seaweed" and Slithy Toves see if you can spot Uncle Tony himself in the photos.
And there's a reasonably lively letters page, where you can spot yours truly trying to stir up a bit of a heated debate over whether Stepping Stone or Randy Scouse Git is the best Monkees song. Place your votes with Tony now! And I don't have to tell you which way to vote, do I?
Voluntary London Photography [dead link] Who says you can't get something for nothing? Mike is a fairly keen amateur photographer, and is offering his services to you for sweet FA just so he can keep in practice. Obviously, it's a little more complicated than that. He's mainly looking to help out non-profit organisations working within the London area, and doesn't take responsibility if you don't particularly like the end results: He'll even deliver the finished pictures to your door, providing your door lies within the operating boundaries of a London Transport Travelcard.
The site includes numerous samples of his work to look at before you take the plunge. Check out the links section, which gives you an insight into Mike's non-photographic obsessions, and see if you can work out where you've seen him before.
Soul2Sole [dead link] Sallyanne is a certified reflexologist, and has studied Reiki massage as well: The site goes into a reasonable amount of detail about the techniques and benefits of reflexology, including links to sites with additional information, before getting down to the nitty gritty of how you can get in touch with Sal for a personal consultation.
Sorry, but once I got the Pulp Fiction reference out of the way, that kind of used up all of my reflexology jokes, so I'd better move on now. Phil has already mentioned in these pages how he's been acting as a patron to some of London's smaller theatres for the last few years: For an annual membership fee, you can join a club which organises regular visits to theatres, restaurants and other social events, taking advantage of group discounts where possible.
There are other organisations that do this sort of thing, but where LTRC differs is in Phil's plan to plough some of the membership money back into the theatres he's patron to, such as the Almeida and the Royal Court. And there was me accusing him of just wanting to hang out with Emperor Palpatine. Anyway, at the time of writing he'd only just started this Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey up, so visit the site and find out more.
I have to say this, as its owner Patch sits next to me at work, and he's a big psychopathic get from Sheffield who'll rip your head off at the slightest provocation. See, he twitched even as I was writing that bit. Patch's reviews are pretty comprehensive as these things go: Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey discs reviewed are mainly mainstream blockbuster affairs, although occasional swaps with highlights from my own collection mean that there's a quota of what he quaintly refers to as "weird depressing shit" on there too.
I await the review of Happiness with some interest. Other sections including a Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey area dedicated to pictures of his son Jaden, whom the URL's named after
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey listed in the menu but still under construction at the time of writing: Feel free to keep checking back to see if he's done it yet.
Mabel Klies [dead link] To be brutally honest - and brutal honesty is compulsory at this point - I didn't really know Mabel that well. I met her fairly regularly at parties and dance performances, but she was more on the periphery of Spank's Pals rather than a fully-fledged member. Just one of those people who you see around now and again, and happily accept as part of the surroundings: Mabel left behind a homepage that documents a lot of the work she did in her specialised fields of computers and dance, which aren't as diverse as you may think.
It shows off some of the web design and graphics commissions she worked on including a charmingly bonkers Shockwave featuring a magic squirrelhas stills and video from dance pieces she choreographed, and documents her Gallery Of Memories project which attempted to marry the two disciplines.
Obviously it's difficult to say how much longer this site will up, but for now it's nice to know that Mabel's still out there in cyberspace. In fact, it looks like the site was taken down a week or two after this page was originally published - just over a month after Mabel's death - but an incomplete archive remains here.
So if you're looking for some sort of insight into what makes Spank's assorted Pals tick, those ten sites should be a good place to start. And if you're really stuck for something to do, maybe you could try and guess which one of them it was that whined about the absence of a links page where they could advertise their site. But don't tell him if you work it out: Being a monkey, and all. Oh, don't bloody start that again.
In case the title Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey you confused, this page from xrefer [dead link, try Wikipedia ] may help. Alternatively, other sites are available if you really want to delve into the dubious-sounding world of Lumberjack Water Sports.
Posted on July
Unpleasant lair of spank the monkey, in Internet Permalink. The Stamp site has now been rebranded as Underprints sniggerand the dead pool archive has been cleared out to make room for more pictures of stamps.
SpankTM July 15, at The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments. Having trouble reading this image? Name and email address are required.
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Last year's VidBinge report came some six weeks after the event itself. This year, I've pulled my finger out and managed to get it up on the web just four days after it happened. Hey, maybe now I've lost my job, at least the updates on here will be more regular. Posted on December 31, in Video Permalink Comments 3. Well, yes, I suppose it was. Though it's nothing like as bad as the six weeks that elapsed between my traditional end-of-year movie roundup party, and the date when I finally got around to writing about it.
Posted on December 30, in Video Permalink Comments 0. Posted on December 29, in Video Permalink Comments 0. Once again, Spank's Pals assemble for their annual vote of the best movies of the year, and then watch as many of them as they can over one day. What did they choose this time? Dating
Is he interested? Not interested?31 Dec Originally posted on The Unpleasant Lair Of Spank The Monkey 21/12/ Last year's VidBinge report came some six weeks after the event itself. This year, I've pulled my finger out and managed to get it up on the web just four days after it happened. Hey, maybe now I've lost my job, at least the updates. 14 Jul The Unpleasant Lair Of Spank The Monkey first appeared on the internet 19 years ago today, on July 14th, , setting out its stall with a post about Warren Ellis' Transmetropolitan because it gave me an excuse to swear a..